You thought I couldn't. You thought I wouldn't. You tactfully stopped asking.
With my OWN HANDS!!! It has a heel and a toe and everything. And it fits! On a real human foot!
Fortunately, it was Spring on Monday (it's now winter again, thanks for asking) but that was all I needed to get on my bike and head to the wool shop with the half-finished sock and -gasp! - ASK them what to do next. Over that hump and it was plain sailing, up to the toe, which I just guessed at, but it is at least attached to itself (albeit not quite in the correct manner).
And now I must rest.